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For today's stop, Keith Rosson's having a little bit of fun with our Would You Rather series, a fun, literary spin on the ole Would You Rather game. He was forced to pick bizarre books sides for 20 questions:
Would You Rather
Would you rather write an entire book with your feet or with your tongue?
Let’s go with feet. Revision’s gonna be a pain either way.
Would you rather have one giant bestseller or a long string of moderate sellers?
I mean, the assumption is that I still get to write regardless, yeah? Either one sounds good. I’m not picky.
Would you rather be a well known author now or be considered a literary genius after you’re dead?
While I’m not picky, I’d also like to reap the countless benefits of literary fame now, while I’m still mostly upright and taking in solid food.
Would you rather write a book without using conjunctions or have every sentence of your book begin with one?
You know, I’ve written three novels, and I’d still need to look up what a conjunction is to be able to answer this question.
Would you rather have every word of your favorite novel tattooed on your skin or always playing as an audio in the background for the rest of your life?
I like tattoos. That would look cool. I can’t concentrate with people talking in the background.
Would you rather write a book you truly believe in and have no one read it or write a crappy book that comprises everything you believe in and have it become an overnight success?
Hmmmm. Let’s go with “overnight success,” this leaving me financially stable enough to write allllll the navel-gazers I want after that.
Would you rather write a plot twist you hated or write a character you hated?
Uh, that’s a tough one. By writing a plot twist that I hate, the question seems to imply that the twist is cheap, a kind of deus ex machina that comes out of nowhere and isn’t very satisfying. That doesn’t sound like much fun. Meanwhile, I’ve written a number of quantifiably shitty characters, and I frigging love it. Hateable characters are often a joy to write.
Would you rather use your skin as paper or your blood as ink?
May my skull by a charcuterie bowl and the expectorate of my enemies be a soothing lip balm forevermore! Would that work?
Would you rather become a character in your novel or have your characters escape the page and reenact the novel in real life?
Yeesh, I don’t want any of my novels to reenacted in real life. Be a disaster for all!
Would you rather write without using punctuation and capitalization or without using words that contained the letter E?
wll shit why cant w do both what th hll
Would you rather have schools teach your book or ban your book?
Teach it. And then invite me to your class to talk to your students, where I try not to swear for an hour, say “dude” a lot on accident, urge everyone to be persistent in the face of rejection, and quickly deposit my honorarium, taking my children out for ice cream afterwards.
Would you rather be forced to listen to Ayn Rand bloviate for an hour or be hit on by an angry Dylan Thomas?
I…will…take…being hit on by Dylan Thomas for $500, Alex?
Would you rather be reduced to speaking only in haiku or be capable of only writing in haiku?
Speaking. It’d make me sound mysterious and smart. My writing is wayyyy more overwrought than that, it’d be no fun to pare it down like that.
Would you rather be stuck on an island with only the 50 Shades Series or a series in a language you couldn’t read?
I guess the 50 Shades series. Either one would kind of be a bummer, though. Plus presumably starving to death sounds like a drag as well.
Would you rather critics rip your book apart publicly or never talk about it at all?
Rip away, my dears!
Would you rather have everything you think automatically appear on your Twitter feed or have a voice in your head narrate your every move?
I think my Twitter feed is already like that.
Would you rather give up your computer or pens and paper?
Ah, shucks. I occasionally do write in a notebook when I feel particularly stuck, but it’s a rarity. I’d want to keep writing on a keyboard.
Would you rather write an entire novel standing on your tippy-toes or laying down flat on your back?
Probably on my back. I do know folks who use standing desks when they write, but I’m not one of them.
Would you rather read naked in front of a packed room or have no one show up to your reading?
I mean, haven’t we all had readings where no one showed up?
Would you rather read a book that is written poorly but has an excellent story, or read one with weak content but is written well?
I mean, I feel like a lot of literary fiction – which I love unabashedly – could be considered “weak content but written well,” right? Nimble, beautiful writing but thin on plot? Transversely, if something is written poorly, can it still be considered an excellent story? Thanks for the interview opportunity!
Releasing on 7/14/20
Magical Realism | Fantasy | Literary
follows disgraced cryptozoologist Mark Sandoval—resolutely arrogant, covered head to foot in precise geometric scarring, and still marginally famous after Hollywood made an Oscar-winner based off his memoir years before—who has been strongly advised by his lawyer to leave the country following a drunken and potentially fatal hit and run. When a woman sends Sandoval grainy footage of what appears to be a unicorn, he quickly hires an assistant and the two head off to the woman's farm in Hvíldarland, a tiny, remote island off the coast of Iceland. When they arrive on the island and discover that both a military base and the surrounding the nearby woods, are teeming with strangeness and secrets, they begin to realize that a supposed unicorn sighting is the least of their worries. will mark the third of Rosson’s novels to be published by Meerkat Press.