Saturday, March 27, 2010

R.I.P. "A Grave Surprise"....



After a long day at work, I relaxed on the couch with my current read while the kids watched TV and the puppy lounged around. It wasn't long before my eyelids refused to obey my commands, and I fell asleep.

I awoke around 11:30pm, to find both of my boys out cold on either end of the sectional, and the puppy licking my face. I rubbed my exhausted eyes, sat up and stretched, and stifled a scream as I took in the horrible scene before me!

My unread copy of Charlaine Harris' mass market paperback "A Grave Surprise" had been massacred! The front cover was torn into three slobberly pieces. Every single page, eaten clean through on the top right side, shredded and sprinkled all over my living room rug.

My hands frantically searched around for my current read (please, please, please be in one piece, please be in one piece, THANK GOD it's in one piece!), as I came to terms with the fact that the book was beyond all hope of saving. I fell to my knees and collected it's disfigured body, silently questioning how this could have happened.

It had been piled up with the two other books of the series on the middle shelf of my TBR bookshelf. It must have somehow fallen down, onto the floor, and into the reach of my puppy while I was lost in my peaceful slumber. No other books around it seem to be disturbed, so I quickly dismissed foul play.

Poor poor book. How awful it is to die a puppy breath death, having never been read! To leave this world having never felt the touch of human fingers lovingly stroking your pages, to never know the feel of a bookmark nestled between them... What a sad, lonely way to go. I am sorry I was not there to save you. I am sorry I did not hear the pained Riiiiiipppppp of each page as my puppy took the corners into his mouth and tore them.

What I am most sorry for is the fact that you are the second book of the three book series that I own, and that I will now be forced to replace you. Please do not hate me for purchasing another copy. It will never mean the same to me as you once did. It's a weakness of mine, that I wish I could ignore, but I simply can't stand to have an incomplete series.

RIP "A Grave Surprise".

4 comments:

  1. One of the best reviews I've read in a while. I'm so sorry about your book.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Haha! Great post...but OH the horror!! That poor book! Oh, and yes, you of course must replace a book in a series.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh nooooooooooooooo!!! Naughty Hercules! I am in mourning for your book, Lori.

    Boof x

    ReplyDelete
  4. Haha. thanks everyone. That was the first time I ever lost a book in such a horrible fashion. I don't know what came over him. He has never bothered any of my books before, but of course - I am now super-weary of leaving any of them within his reach!

    ReplyDelete