Jayme K's Guide to Books & Booze

Time to grab a book and get tipsy!

Books & Booze is a new mini-series of sorts here on TNBBC that will post every Friday in October. The participating authors were challenged to make up their own drinks, name and all, or create a drink list for their characters and/or readers using drinks that already exist. 

Today, author Jayme K give us a lesson:

I like the concept of ‘adapting’ a book into an alcoholic beverage. Disorderly, I’d imagine, would be some sort of fucked up cocktail. The kind of drink that gives you alcohol poisoning if had more than once in a single sitting. So for the sake of the people, I’m going to tone it down to something enjoyable, that won’t cause you to shit out your liver the next morning.

First we’re going to add just a bit of Blue Curacao—because why not? It’s delicious. How much is ‘just a bit’, you ask? Well, it depends on how much citrus you like in your drink. I’d say at least 3 ounces.

Next, you’re going to want to add some Grey Goose vodka because it is, easily, the best inexpensive vodka on the market and if you disagree with me, just know that you’re wrong. Add 1.5 ounces of that to your drink.

And at that point you’re going to want to add Margaritaville Mango Margarita mix to fill the rest of your cup.

What you’ll have is a green tinted drink that should taste exactly like Mountain Dew. If it doesn’t, then you fucked up somewhere along the line—don’t blame me.

How is Disorderly like Mountain Dew? Well, it may make you feel a little gross.  

Jayme K. is the author of the novel Disorderly, as well as numerous short stories, essays, and poems. His work has been published by UnHollywood, Before Sunrise Press, Underground Books, Miracle E-zine, Nostrovia! Poetry, Your Daily Subvert, Moon Project, and Flash Fiction 365. He lives in Boston.